高考英语二轮讲义-读后续写作基本技法

这是一份高考英语二轮讲义-读后续写作基本技法，共16页。学案主要包含了方法运用，写作分析，要点解析，高分句型1，高分句型2，高分句型3等内容，欢迎下载使用。
A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE
The twins were filled with excitement as they thught f the surprise they were planning fr Mther’s Day. Hw pleased and prud Mther wuld be when they brught her breakfast in bed. They planned t make French tast and chicken prridge. They had watched their mther in the kitchen. There was nthing t it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what t d.
The big day came at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair went dwn the stairs quietly t the kitchen. They decided t bil the prridge first. They put sme rice int a pt f water and left it t bil while they made the French tast. Jeff brke tw eggs int a plate and added in sme milk. Jenna fund the bread and put tw slices int the egg mixture. Next, Jeff turned n the secnd stve burner t heat up the frying pan. Everything was ging smthly until Jeff started frying the bread. The pan was t ht and the bread turned black within secnds. Jenna threw the burnt piece int the sink and put in the ther slice f bread. This time, she turned dwn the fire s it cked nicely.
Then Jeff nticed steam shting ut f the pt and the lid starting t shake. The next minute, the prridge biled ver and put ut the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully, Jeff stayed calm and turned ff the gas quickly. But the stve was a mess nw. Jenna tld Jeff t clean it up s they culd cntinue t ck the rest f the prridge. But Jeff’s hand tuched the ht burner and he gave a cry f pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cld water. Then she caught the smell f burning. Oh dear! The piece f bread in the pan had turned black as well.
注意:续写词数应为150个左右。
As the twins lked arund them in disappintment, their father appeared. ____
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The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and wke their mther up. _______
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Step 1:厘清主题 把握走向
Step 2:寻找主线 深挖要点
Step 3:精研首句 起承转合
根据所给续文段落首句产生问题链接,形成续写思路,采用G-N(Given-New)和Q-A(Questin-Answer)策略,做好起承转合,创造新的情节。
Paragraph 1: As the twins lked arund them in disappintment, their father appeared.
Q1: What was Father’s first instinct when faced with the mess?
Q2: Hw did the twins explain their plan t their father?
Q3: What did Father d t help the twins t make delicius French tast and chicken prridge?
Paragraph 2:The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and wke their mther up.
Q1: What was Mther’s first instinct when the twins wke her up?
Q2: Wuld the twins give Mther a big surprise? Hw did they express their best wishes t Mther?
Q3: Hw did Mther feel? Hw can yu design the ending mre appealing and meaningful?
Step 4:吃透语言 风格一致
为了使所写的内容和语言和原文保持连贯性和一致性,读后续写需要通过在理解原文的基础上,巧妙利用 “拉平效应”,创造性地模仿和使用语言,即继承原文语言表达方面的显著特征,包括写作手法及语言表达技巧,从而一方面保证写作的效率和流畅度,另一方面保证写作在各个语言层次和表达风格上和原文保持一致。
通过分析语篇,可以从五个方面理解原文的语言应用技巧:
1.场景描写(Surrundings)
场景描写指的是描写人、物、事发生的时间、地点、自然环境及社会场景等。场景描写可以充当背景信息,提供人、物、事发生的具体设定。其次,场景描写可以表达角色的感情、情绪,可以随着情节的发展有所变化,甚至可以提示、推动情节的发展,增强语篇的代入感。
2.动作描写(Actins)
动作描写指的是描写人物在具体情况下的行为举止,是情节发展的具体体现。恰到好处的动作描写不仅可以塑造生动形象的人物,还可以反映人物的情感态度及心理变化,并最终反映人物的性格特点及思想品质。
3.心理描写(Feelings)
心理描写指的是描写人物在具体情况下的看法、感受、情感及心理活动,并由此反映人物的性格特点及思想品质。心理描写除了对心理的直接描写,还可以结合动作描写及场景描写,共同构成有意义、紧凑的语篇。
4.有效对话(Effective Dialgues)
有效对话是记叙语篇中塑造人物的一个重要手段。对话的有效性首先体现在符合人物设定,这样不仅能够有效地推动情节的发展,更能够增加记叙的生动性。此外,对话语言也要符合记叙语篇的语言特点,即生活化、简化及去书面化。
5.修辞(Figures f speech)
修辞是增加语言生动性的最佳手段。它可以引起共鸣,使抽象的情境具体化。常见的可以应用的修辞有比喻、拟人、夸张和排比等。
考场满分作文1:
As the twins lked arund them in disappintment, their father appeared.①Father’s appearing was like a savir t the tw children.②Under the guidance f their father, they tk psitive actin and started all ver again.They made the bread and then went n cking prridge.Father helped them adjust the fire, ③which was the key t success.It was all right this time.Delicius breakfast was ready.④Hw happy they were!
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and wke their mther up.⑤When their mther saw the delicius and perfect breakfast in frnt f her, she was very surprised.
⑥It was nt nly the gift, but the lve f the children fr her that mved her very much.The tw children culd finish cking a breakfast, which she didn’t expect.The children said ludly, ⑦“Happy Mther’s Day! ” ⑧Mther hugged them tightly and kissed them again and again.
评卷老师点评:
①过渡自然流畅。②时态、语境和前文相互照应。③使用高分句式。④使用高分句式。⑤使用高分句式。⑥使用并列结构。⑦使用直接引语,生动真实。⑧动作及情感表达真实细腻。
考场满分作文2:
As the twins lked arund them in disappintment, their father appeared.Faced with the mess the twins had made f the kitchen, Father felt annyed but tried t cntain himself.Jenna ran up t him, whispering “ just want t make breakfast fr Mm as Mther’s Day gift.” After he learned what all was abut, his annyance gave way t relief and delight.Immediately, he jined them and they started all ver again.Sn the French tast and chicken prridge were ready. The kitchen filled with the scent f breakfast and sweetness f a family.Lking at the wrk, the three exchanged an understanding smile.After signaling them t keep it a secret, Father slipped int the bedrm, pretending t knw nthing abut it.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and wke their mther up.Still a little sleepy, Mther failed t figure ut what they were up t.“Happy Mther’s Day!” The twins cngratulated.“We made breakfast fr yu as yu d that fr us.Mm, we lve yu!” Thugh still in her pajamas, Mther tk a bite f the tast and sipped the ht prridge.Lst in the delicius breakfast and pure lve frm her twins, she sbbed, with delightful tears streaming dwn her face.Lvingly, she pressed tw gentle kisses n their freheads, prudly enjying their best wishes.Their father was standing in the drway, recrding this tuching scene.The whle rm was bathed in a happy Mther’s Day atmsphere.
评卷老师点评:文章用词精准(whisper, understanding, signal, pretend, lst in, stream dwn, prudly等),句式高级(非谓语动词、独立主格和介词with的复合结构等),通过动作、对话和心理活动等描写,生动、形象地呈现了双胞胎孩子在母亲节为妈妈做早餐,献上一份特别的节日礼物和惊喜。
考场满分作文3:
As the twins lked arund them in disappintment, their father appeared.Seeing the mess,Father frze with shck, as if rted n the grund. Frm the black bread and the spilled prridge, he suddenly figured ut their secret.A smile f understanding flashed acrss his face.He realized their intentin.He jined them in preparing the Mther’s Day surprise immediately.They started all ver again.Everything went smthly.The chicken and rice were dancing harmniusly in the biling water pt and bread slices were shwing ff its mst tremendus glden clr. Sn the French tast and chicken prridge were ready. The kitchen filled with the scent f breakfast and sweetness f a family.Despite the il stains n the twins’ aprns, nthing seemed imperfect, and all was in place except the mst imprtant ne.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and wke their mther up.Still a little sleepy, Mther failed t figure ut what they were up t, but the cheerful “Happy Mther’s Day” frm the tw sweeties brught her back t reality.The breakfast with lve made by her twins really struck her heartstrings.Mther kissed them and gave them each a bear hug, saying “Oh dear, thank yu my sweeties.What a big surprise!” The next mment, she wke up Father, eager t share the blessing and the inviting breakfast seasned with lve.Father, wh had been awake, cperatively rubbed his eyes and tk a big bite, winking at the twins secretly.After all, the surprise did make a sweet surprise!
评卷老师点评:文章通过动作、对话和心理活动等描写,生动、形象地呈现了双胞胎孩子在母亲节为妈妈做早餐,献上一份特别的节日礼物和惊喜。在故事情节推进的过程中,运用语篇分析的主位推进理论、呼应和修辞等手法来揭示语篇的感恩、互爱的主题,让人豁然明白“我们平时认为妈妈无条件的爱和支持是理所当然,没什么大不了的。等到自己回报母爱时,却发现并不轻松”, 反映内心触动和成长历程。
【方法运用】
1．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
I was an average student in my early elementary years. I came hme with a steady flw f B’s, C’s and the ccasinal F’s in secnd language subjects. I was tld that I wasn’t applying myself and, as every reprt card I ever brught hme clearly stated, I talked t much.
I didn’t write when I was suppsed t write. I talked t thers while the teacher was giving instructins. That I culd recite what she had said t the class while I was talking was nt helpful because I had a negative effect n my classmates’ learning. S I regularly brught hme disappinting reprt cards.
My parents and my teachers didn’t knw what t d with me. Punishments didn’t seem t wrk. Rewards didn’t seem t either. And, frankly, I dn’t think I knew what I culd d t “apply myself”. And I certainly didn’t knw hw t nt enjy talking with my classmates! What I knew was that I talked t much. Until grade 5.
That autumn, we had a sudden change in teachers as ur elderly teacher tk a medical leave. In his place, a yung substitute (代课老师) arrived — Mrs Ryal. She lked like she was freshly ut f university and seemed t yung t be cast in the rle f being respnsible fr a class f tween, but there she was, charged with a lively grup, and me.
I dn’t remember many details f that year except the afternn when I gt my first reprt card frm her. She handed ut the reprt cards right after the afternn break and invited us t lk them ver. Then she let us knw that we culd all talk quietly amngst urselves while she called each student up ne at a time, in alphabetical rder (按字母顺序), t discuss ur reprt cards with her.
注意：
1.续写词数应为150左右：
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
I lked ver my reprt card, expecting the usual result.
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Then it was my turn t talk with her.
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2．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
Ten miles away std a huse with shiny red walls, a green garden and an apple tree. A yung girl’s face wuld be seen reflecting frm ne f the large glassy windws. Her name is Maggie. Her eyes were sparkling and n her face there was a smile which culd light a millin candles. She seemed t be lnging fr a chance t play like a yung child, but she had n strength in her legs because she and her family met with an accident, in which she lst bth her legs.
But her spirit was strng. She wuld be inspired by seeing birds fly. The flying eagle wuld make her want t fly. She was lnely. She lnged fr a true friend wh wuld talk t her and teach her t fly r at least tell her stries abut saring int the blue sky.
One evening, Maggie slwly rlled her wheelchair t the giant windw and lked ut t the many huses that lay acrss the rad. Suddenly she heard smene singing and then culd see an ld man in a pilt suit singing in glry. The beautiful sund and the meldy made the little girl happy. Suddenly he stpped and gazed up tward her. “What are yu staring at?” he said angrily. “Yu think I’m a circus clwn? (马戏团小丑)” “N, Sir. I was just listening t yu. Yu sing very well,” she said. “I dn’t need yur praises. I dn’t need anyne!” he shuted. He started t walk t his huse and shut the dr. Tears rlled dwn frm her apple-red cheeks as the man shuted at her. She was lnely.
Next mrning, Maggie pushed her wheelchair acrss the garden t the stne rad as little children played hide-and-seek arund her. Suddenly ut f nwhere a lading truck came rumbling acrss tward her. Terrified, she tried t mve away frm its path but the wheels f her chair were stuck. “Oh my,” she thught as the truck came in her directin fast, with the driver unaware f the bstructin in frnt f him. She screamed ludly but in a split secnd she was pulled ut f her wheelchair by smene and fell n the grund. She clsed her eyes and shivered as the truck passed her whistling. As she pened her eyes, she culd see a man standing beside her.
注意：
1. 续写词数应为150左右；
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
She gazed up t him and immediately recgnized him as the man she saw singing last night.
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Maggie gt t knw his name was Ken and that he was a retired pilt.
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3．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
Mama was weaving a mat (织垫子) with wild-grass stalks (茎秆) when she called t Acheny, “Will yu d me a favr and fetch me sme water fr the paints, Acheny?” In the crner were pts f clring matter she’d use t paint the finished mats. “Of curse, Mama!” Acheny picked up a clay pt as she slipped utside.
She didn’t like mat-weaving, althugh it was a traditin fr a mther t pass n the skills t her daughter. Acheny wuld rather be playing utdrs with her friends. Outside, Acheny called t Ajuma, whse huse was acrss frm hers.
Bth girls, with clay pts balanced n their heads, made their way t the Niger River. When they arrived at the water’s edge, what they fund was shcking. The river was gne! In its place was a blanket f dark green leaves dtted by clred flwers.
“Oh n!” Acheny cried. “The river is gne! There’s n water fr drinking, cking, r bathing! Mama wn’t have water t mix the paints fr her mats.
Last year, the rainy seasn brught an invasin f water hyacinths (水葫芦).The plants cvered the river and left n rm t put in a pt t fetch water. There was n rm t bathe r swim. Fishermen culdn’t cast their nets fr fish. And nw the water hyacinths were back
“Hw culd such a pretty plant cause such harm?” Acheny wndered
The adults jumped int the water amng the brad, green leaves, They began thrwing them nt the riverbank. Acheny and Ajuma jined them. When they’d cleared enugh plants, the girls filled their pts with water. A pile f water hyacinths lay n the riverbank What a pity t waste such pretty flwers, Acheny thught. She picked sme fr Mama, and then the girls headed hme.
Each day, they fund the river cvered by water hyacinths as if n ne had cleared the waterfrnt the day befre. One day, as Acheny mved an armful f dried water hyacinths ut f her way, she had an idea. Carrying the plants under her arm, she ran hme. “Mama, will yu teach me t weave?
注意：1.续写词数应为150左右；
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Mama was t glad t pass n the mat-weaving skills t her daughter.
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Mama and Acheny then taught their neighbrs.
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4．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
My kitchen was a mess. Cluds f flur dusted the cunters, the flr, and the aprns f the wmen gathered there.
Peels frm 40 punds f apples were piled in the crner. Mixing bwls sticky with cinnamn and sugar tipped messily in the sink. The wrappers frm 12 punds’ wrth f butter spilled frm the trash. But, ww, it did smell sweet.
Six f us had gathered that Saturday mrning t make apple pies. Once clleagues, nw simply friends, we shared an intense curisity abut all srt s f things, and we lved t chat.
Tday ur curisity and chatter were directed t pie-making. While I was n tp chef, I knew hw t use a rlling pin and I’d had years f practice serving up strawberry cakes, ccnut cream, and sur cherry pies t my family.
Pie-making is a lt f wrk. Whever cined the phrase “easy as pie” must have meant cnsuming, nt creating. We spent hurs peeling, cring, slicing, measuring, and learning t handle delicate dugh (面团).
“It’s sticking t the rlling pin,” ne f them said, her vice full f depressin.
“Oh n, it’s cracking!” came anther cry. I assured them the patched crust (皮) wuld simply serve as a reminder that these pies were hme-made.
Outside, an Octber snwstrm struck heavily. Inside, thugh, it was all steamy windws, sft music and happy laughter as we finally put ur pies int the ven.
When planning “Pie Day”, we decided that we wuld each make tw pies: One fr ur families and ne t dnate t smene else.
By early afternn, 12 pies had been placed n the cunter, their perfectly imperfect crusts shining gldenly. We rushed t prepare fr delivery, packing the pies messily in bxes and bags. We marched dwn the driveway. The snw had melted (融化); the rads were clear. It was time t deliver.
Then, disaster struck. One f the painstakingly crafted pies melted thrugh the bag it was packed in and fell nt the driveway. Screams f hrrr fllwed.
注意：
1.续写词数应为150左右；
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
One friend ran back int the kitchen and returned with frks.
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The best part was still t cme: Handing ut pies was even better than eating pies.
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参考答案
1．
I lked ver my reprt card, expecting the usual result. But t my surprise, her feedback was different. Instead f fcusing n the negatives, she pinted ut the imprvements I had made. She acknwledged my effrts, hwever small, and encuraged me t keep wrking n my weaknesses. I duble-checked and made sure it was definitely my reprt card. Even thugh we had been given permissin t talk amngst urselves, I had very little t say t friends as I waited anxiusly fr her t call my name.
Then it was my turn t talk with her. She began with a warm smile, “Yu have any questins fr me?” I remember lking dwn at my reprt card and saying, “I dn’t get A’s, besides, nwhere n here des it say I talk t much.” She said, “I figured yu already knew yu talked t much, s I thught I culd tell yu smething different. As fr the grades, yu earned the A’s.” Frm that day n, I knew I was capable f “straight A’s” and culd have qualities ther than that f a student wh talked t much in class.
【写作分析】本文以学生的学习经历和改变为线索展开，讲述了“我”在小学早期是一个成绩中等且爱在课堂上讲话的学生。由于这种不良习惯，“我”不仅影响了自己的学习，还对同学产生了负面影响，导致常常带回家令人失望的成绩单。尽管父母和老师尝试了各种方法，但都没有显著效果。直到五年级时，班里来了一位年轻的代课老师Mrs Ryal，她以不同的教学方式处理成绩单，让“我”对自己的学习问题有了新的认识和期待。
【要点解析】1. 段落续写：
①由第一段首句内容“我看了看我的成绩单，期待着和往常一样的结果。”可知，第一段可描写作者得到的成绩单和往常不同。
②由第二段首句内容“然后轮到我和她说话了。”可知，第二段可描写作者和Mrs Ryal交流的具体内容。
2. 续写线索：成绩单反馈不同——肯定进步——开始谈话——给于肯定——感动。
3. 词汇激活
行为类
①指出：pint ut/identify
②鼓励：encurage/inspire
③认为：figure/think
情绪类
①惊讶：surprise/astnishment
②焦急地：anxiusly/nervusly
[高分句型1]Even thugh we had been given permissin t talk amngst urselves, I had very little t say t friends as I waited anxiusly fr her t call my name.(运用了even thugh引导的让步状语从句和as引导的时间状语从句)
[高分句型2] I dn’t get A’s, besides, nwhere n here des it say I talk t much.(运用了nwhere位于句首的倒装句以及省略that的宾语从句)
2．She gazed up t him and immediately recgnized him as the man she saw singing last night." Thank yu fr saving me," she said in gratitude," and I ' m srry if I bthered yu last night with my listening." The man lked at her, a sftness in his eyes." I didn’t mean t be s harsh." he said, his vice filled with remrse. The sftness pened Maggie’s heart. She pured ut her stry f the accident, her lnging fr a friend, and her bsessin with flying. Ken listened intently, his heart ging ut t the yung girl." And I dn’t seem t be the nly ne wh lves flying." said the girl, eyeing the man’s unifrm.
Maggie gt t knw his name was Ken and that he was a retired pilt. As the sun began t set, Maggie learned s much abut Ken that she realized that she had fund a true friend in Ken. Fr the first time in a lng time, she felt genuine happiness. The next day, Ken came back t visit Maggie with a small gift, a bk abut flying. Maggie’s face lit up as she flipped thrugh the pages, imagining herself saring thrugh the cluds. Many afternns saw them in the garden, laughing and enjying each ther’s cmpany. Their friendship grew strnger with each passing day.
【写作分析】本文以人物为线索展开，讲述了一个名叫麦琪的年轻女孩，因为一次事故失去了双腿。尽管身体受到限制，麦琪的精神依然坚强。她渴望找到一个真正的朋友，能和她交谈、教她飞翔，或者至少给她讲述关于蓝天的故事。一天，麦琪在窗前听到一个老人唱歌，她很开心地欣赏着。但老人却生气地责备她，并走回自己的房子。麦琪感到非常孤独。第二天，当一辆货车朝她驶来时，她被一个人拉出轮椅并躺在地上，幸免于难。她睁开眼睛看到的人正是昨晚唱歌的那个男人。他们互相交流，麦琪向他倾诉了她的故事。她发现这个男人名叫肯，是一位退休飞行员。他们成为了真正的朋友，每天在花园里笑着相处。他们的友谊与日俱增。
【要点解析】1.段落续写：
①由第一段首句内容“她抬头望着他，立刻认出他就是昨晚唱歌的那个人。”可知，第一段可描写麦琪表达感谢以及向肯讲述她的故事。
②由第二段首句内容“麦琪知道他的名字叫肯，是一名退休飞行员。”可知，第二段可描写麦琪了解肯的很多事情以及他们成为了好朋友。。
2.续写线索：麦琪抬头望着他并且认出他——麦琪表达感谢——麦琪讲述自己的故事——了解肯的事情——他们成为好朋友——感悟
3.词汇激活
行为类
①打扰：bthered/ disturbed
②.渴望：lng fr / yearn fr
③.意识到：realized /be aware f
情绪类
①.感谢：thank/shwing her appreciatin/shw her gratitude/be grateful
②.专心地：intently / attentively
[高分句型1]. And I dn’t seem t be the nly ne wh lves flying.（运用了关系代词wh引导的定语从句。）
[高分句型2]. Maggie’s face lit up as she flipped thrugh the pages, imagining herself saring thrugh the cluds.（运用现在分词imagining作状语。）
3．
Mama was t glad t pass n the mat-weaving skills t her daughter. But she was dubtful abut the water hyacinth stalks. Acheny insisted that the water hyacinth stalks wuld be strng enugh t be made int schlbags t carry bks, and baskets t take vegetables t the market. S, Mama began t teach Acheny hw t separate the stalks frm the leaves, hw t bend the wven rpe int a rund shape and hw t tie the rpes tgether. Acheny learned very quickly and sn she culd weave bags and baskets all by herself.
Mama and Acheny then taught their neighbrs. They were all eager t make their wn crafts using thse water hyacinth stalks, which nw seemed nt s annying. They made schlbags fr their children, and baskets, trays, and chair mats fr daily use. By the end f the rainy seasn, the villagers were eager t g t the river every mrning t harvest water hyacinths. They n lnger thught f the plant as an invader, but a prvider. Acheny was prud that she made a difference t her cmmunity.
【写作分析】本篇书面表达是读后续写。本文以人物为线索展开。妈妈在织垫子时叫阿琴约帮她取些水来拌颜料。阿琴约不喜欢织垫子，但还是愉快地答应了。她和朋友阿朱玛去尼日尔河取水，却发现河水不见了，取而代之的是一片布满彩色花朵的绿色叶子。原来，去年雨季水葫芦入侵，覆盖了整条河，导致无法取水、沐浴或捕鱼。成人和孩子们开始清理水葫芦。阿琴约觉得这些花扔掉可惜，便捡了一些给妈妈。每天清理的水葫芦第二天又会重新覆盖河面，这让阿琴约想到一个主意。她拿着干枯的水葫芦跑回家问妈妈：“你能教我织东西吗？”
【要点解析】1.段落续写
①由第一段句首内容“妈妈很高兴把编织垫子的技艺传给女儿。”可知，第一段可以描写妈妈教阿琴约的过程。
②由第二段句首内容“然后，妈妈和阿琴约教他们的邻居。”可知，第二段可以描写妈妈和阿琴约教他们的邻居的过程和因此带来的变化。
2.续写线索：传艺给女儿——学会编织——二人教邻居——变化——感到骄傲
3.词汇激活
行为类
①坚持：insist/persist
②开始：begin/start
③教导：teach/instruct
情绪类
①怀疑的：dubtful/skeptical
②烦人的：annying/tiresme
【高分句型1】Acheny insisted that the water hyacinth stalks wuld be strng enugh t be made int schlbags t carry bks, and baskets t take vegetables t the market.( 运用了that引导的宾语从句)
【高分句型2】They were all eager t make their wn crafts using thse water hyacinth stalks, which nw seemed nt s annying.( 运用了which引导的定语从句)
【高分句型3】Acheny was prud that she made a difference t her cmmunity. ( 运用了that引导的宾语从句)
4．第一段：One friend ran back int the kitchen and returned with frks. We lked fr every last bit f the fallen pie, laughing and crying at the same time. It was a mment f pure jy and cnnectin, as we realized that even in the face f disaster, there is always smething t be grateful fr. The incident nly made ur pies mre precius, reminding us f the hard wrk and lve that went int each ne.
第二段：The best part was still t cme: Handing ut pies was even better than eating pies. As we kncked n drs and surprised strangers with ur sweet gifts, we were met with smiles and gratitude. Peple were amazed that we wuld take the time t bake pies fr them, and their reactins filled us with a sense f purpse and happiness. One wman even cried tears f jy, saying that it had been a difficult year and this unexpected act f kindness meant the wrld t her. By the end f the day, we felt exhausted but fulfilled, knwing that we had brught a little bit f warmth and sweetness int the lives f thers.
【写作分析】本文以“派”为线索展开，故事讲述了作者和朋友周末聚在一起做苹果派，在策划“派日”时，她们决定每人做两个派：一个给家人，一个捐给别人，把温暖快乐送给家人并传递到社会。虽然很费事，但她们很开心；虽然外面非常寒冷，但她们做派的场面充满温情；虽然在制作和分发的过程中有些小小的失误，但她们总能以乐观的情怀去应对。
【要点解析】1.段落续写：
①由第一段首句内容“一个朋友跑回厨房，拿着叉子回来。”可知，第一段可描写那个朋友寻找掉在路上的苹果派并捡起来以及她们的想法和体验。
②由第二段首句内容“最精彩的部分还在后面：分发派甚至比吃苹果派更好。”可知，第二段可描写作者和朋友们分发苹果派的快乐过程。
2.续写线索：寻找——捡起——分发——惊喜——感激——辛苦但快乐——感悟
3.词汇激活
行为类
①. 寻找：lk fr/seek
②. 遇到：meet with/cme acrss
情绪类
①. 感谢：be grateful/shw gratitude
②. 惊讶的：amazed/surprised
[高分句型1]. The incident nly made ur pies mre precius, reminding us f the hard wrk and lve that went int each ne. (由非谓语动词现在分词作状语)
[高分句型2]. One wman even cried tears f jy, saying that it had been a difficult year and this unexpected act f kindness meant the wrld t her. (由非谓语动词现在分词作状语和that引导的宾语从句)
要素
描述
主 题
when
Mther’s Day
本文以母亲节为线索展开,讲述了双胞胎Jenna和Jeff为了献给母亲一份美味的早餐,自己动手做起早餐来,但不幸的是,他们接连失败,后来在父亲的帮助下获得成功,他们把早餐献给亲爱的母亲,母亲非常感动的故事。
where
At hme
wh
The twins—Jeff and Jenna
what
The pair prepared breakfast fr their mther.
why
They wanted t give their mther a surprise.
文段
线索
文脉线索
前文
情感线
excited→disappinted
故事线
First, they biled the prridge.→Next, they made the French tast.→A slice f bread turned black.→Then they fund the prridge biled ver and put ut the fire.→The ther piece f bread turned black, t.
续写
要点
1.They made the bread and then went n cking prridge.
2.Their mther was surprised t find the breakfast cked by Jeff and Jenna.
续写第一段梗概
Their father helped them adjust the fire and they prepared breakfast successfully.Hw happy they were!
续写第二段梗概
The twins’ mther was surprised t see the delicius and perfect breakfast in frnt f her.She was deeply mved by her children.